The Top 10 Ways to say 'I Love You'
by Shmarah
Summary: Akira's writing an article for Comptiq about romance, Minoru's admitted to the infirmary AGAIN, their producer acts like a total fangirl set on getting them together, and I'm writing a short Shirakira story. So nothing explodes...wish on your lucky star!
1. LUCKY CHANERU!

LUCKYYYYYYY CHANERUUUU!

OHARAKKI! One-shot ftw.

I only wrote this cuz I was sad Lucky Channel didn't come to a better end. Preferably with some Shirogami in it. Sniffs.

It's pretty corny. And too lovey dovey for me. But, eh, I tried a different style of writing, this only took me a day, and I didn't spell anything wrong! (I can't tell if these are good or bad things...)

Anyways, I'll put the second chapter up tomorrow and the third the next day. Yaaaay school vacations! And being sick! Which reminds me, I want some chicken noodle soup.

* * *

Found by producer, left on Lucky Channel Set:

Akira Kogami's Top 10 Most Romantic Ways to Say I Love You:

10. A bouquet of red roses

9. Je t'aime!

a cuddly teddy bear

7. A love song~

6. Sending a love letter 3

5. Writing a romantic poem!

4. A cherry blossom kiss!

3. Dropping on one knee with a diamond ring!

2. A passionate kiss on the lips~

1. A simple, "I love you."

Overheard after the show:

"This a stupid list. Nobody really does stuff like that anymore."  
*CLANG*  
*An ashtray and Minoru Shiraishi slam into the floor with a crash*  
"DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH!"

"CAK! A-AKIRA-SAMA...? THIS IS YOUR LI...?"

"As if you'd know anything about romance!"

"Wh...wh...where did that ashtray come from?"  
"...You're working with me here. I've been in thousands of relationships, felt the aching burdens of never finding a guy good enough for me, put up with the billions in love with me. I'm a dreamer that come's with a heart to spread love again! Learn what real romance is about already, Shiraishi-kun."  
"Y...yes m'aam."

"Anyways, Comptiq magazine asked for my expertise to write about how I say, 'I love you,' so you can just shut up."  
"Comptiq, huh... I thought that yesterday you were begging for them to let you—"  
"URUSAI!"  
*STAMP*  
"M-my foot!"  
"Anyway, who gives a ***** what you think? I'll teach you the basics of romance right now. This will be a useful lesson for you, so put some back into it."  
(The producer now sneaks onto set and turns on camera, witnessing the following scene)

"First and foremost is the first impression, of course. When you're on a first date, you can't let him french kiss you. Unless he's really cute."  
"Uhhh... Akira-sama..."  
"Second, if you meet a guy with an English accent, go for him. Foreign boyfriends are very impressive. Of course, this could just be a misconception because everyone watches too much Axis Powers: Hetalia lately, and who wouldn't fall in love with Arthur?"  
"You do realize I'm a boy... And I don't really support yaoi pairings, if that's what you're shooting at..."  
"Third, even though you totally expect every guy to say they love you eventually, you always have to act surprised for their confession. For example, say, 'I love you.'"  
"A-AKIRA!"  
*Shiraishi's face notably red*  
"SAY IT."  
"Y-yes... ma'am..."  
"...Well?"  
"I... love you."

*Momentary pause, Akira looks at feet*  
"Ah, well, um... Akira's like, whoa! Minoru, this is so sudden! Fawn, fawn, fawn..."  
*Akira strikes a cute pose*  
"Like that."  
"Natural, you say..." *Minoru looks unconvinced*  
"Now I'd go on to tell you what to do if, as a variation, you're going with a guy into a hou— oh right, you're too young for that. So in your case, you'd do something like this..."  
*Akira turns to look Minoru in the eye, says in cute voice,*  
"Minoru, darling, I..."  
*Akira's voice and eyes suddenly loses its fake cuteness and she looks shocked as it becomes serious*  
"I love you."

(At this point, the producer has to put the camera down in order to help the crew carry the unconscious Minoru Shiraishi to the studio infirmary.)

* * *

Aimai Net Darling has been stuck in my head while writing this whole thing. |||"


	2. NEE?

(The studio infirmary, built in 2000, the stated reason because the nearest hospital was quite far and there were incidents with lighting and electrical equipment. Some speculate it was only to accommodate the increasing amount of injuries that seemed to begin when Akira Kogami was hired, first as a small background character, then onto bigger and greater roles. Minoru was put into his usual room.)

Overheard by the surpassingly sneaky and eavesdropping producer the next morning:

"Hey, you're awake!"  
"GAAH!"  
"What are you doing hiding under the covers, idiot! You are glad to see me, right?  
"O-o-o-of course I am!  
"That's great, RIGHT?" *Shiraishi trembles*  
"Cuz you're the assistant, RIGHT!"  
*tremble*  
"Ahahahahaaa!" *Akira maniacally laughs*

*Minoru reaches over to bedside table*  
"B-but look at all these... a oopsie daisy... fan letters I got from fans who heard I was in the infirmary again! Chee!"  
*Shiraishi grins wide*

"H-HOW?" *Akira seems to prepare to attack him, then stops herself*

"Uh, uh... Never mind it for now."  
*Akira looks uncomfortable, as if out of place.* "When I said I love you, you know I was just, you know. In character. You didn't like, take me seriously... 'Cause you know I didn't mean it, right?"

*tremble*

"RIGHT?"  
*Akira bends down so that she is eye to eye with Minoru*  
*Minoru, for once, doesn't seem frightened.*

"That would depend."

*Akira looks questioningly*

"On whether you meant it."  
*Minoru suddenly leans forward and kisses Akira*

(By the producer's request, the Akira was put in a cot by Shiraishi-kun's when she fainted.)

Found on Akira's bedside table, later to be published in Comptiq:

Akira Kogami's Top 10 List of the Real Ways People Say I Love You:

10. Stamping on their foot.  
9. Threatening to get them fired  
8. Fooling them into thinking they're fired on the air.  
7. Constant insults including, "You're a failure!" or "You have no future!" or, "SHUT UP, STOP BUTTING IN!"  
6. Making them uncomfortable by acting jealous when they call Miyuki Takara cuter than you.  
5. Calling their cellphone so that it goes off while he's MC-ing a talent show.  
4. Sending them to Mt. Fuji for water.  
3. Replacing them with super-cute Daisuke Ono while they're in Fuji.  
2. Slamming an ashtray into their face.  
1. A simple, "Oh, I hate youuu!"

"Hey! You were the one who set my cellphone off?"

*Akira turns to see Minoru looking over her shoulder as she writes in the infirmary cot*  
"Shiraishi-kun!"

*Minoru braces himself for an attack, Akira pounces on him and she falls on top of him on the cot*

"A-akira-sama! That was scary! I could have fal—"  
*Minoru is interrupted as Akira hugs him, nuzzling her pink head into his shirt*

*content sigh*

*A brief silence*

"Akira?"  
"Yes?"  
"I hate you."  
*CLANG*  
*An ashtray slams into Minoru's face*  
"WA-WH-WHERE DO THESE...GAH!"  
*Akira smiles*  
"I hate you too, Shiraishi-kun."


	3. BAI BEE!

Epilogue desu!  
*Nee= Right (Right? RIGHT?)  
And, as for all the junk I write, bold is for when they're speaking together.

* * *

~Doo doo rrrri da didi doo DOO!~  
_"LUCKY CHANERUUUU!"  
"Oharakki! I'm Akira Kogami, you're navigator..."  
"And I'm the assistant, Minoru Shiraishi..."  
_  
(Off-stage conversation)  
—See, don't they look much happier up there? I think it's cute. Believe me, I was unsure about this job at first, almost refused it, but after seeing how cute these guys were together, I just about lost it. I almost gave up on them, but then I found my chance and here I have it, Shirogami on film!  
—Itou-sama, don't you think people will be angry? Especially Minoru and Akira. They have lives and everything and Akira can get pretty scary when she's mad...  
—These guys will be a hit! Seriously, they're the cutest pairing since... since Chibitalia and HRE!  
—What about the ones that think Akira likes Daisuke Ono?  
—What about the ones that support MinoruXAkira? C'mon, it'll be a hit!  
—Maybe you should try revealing your footage in a... smaller way. Akira will kill you if you put that lovey dovey scene on TV.  
—...Give it to a paparazzi?  
—Smaller.  
—Local news 12 network?  
—Smaller.  
—...Uh, radio program?  
—Go much smaller.  
—What do you want me to do, give it to some lame fan-writer and get them to write an AkiraXMinoru fanfiction about it?  
—That would work!

...

—Well, there is this girl I've been keeping my eye on that's writing an Animal Crossing fanfic so...  
—There you have it.  
—Oh look, they're almost done.  
"_Oh no, we're out of time? Already? I wanted to tell you more about how wonderful Akira is! Because I am wonderful, Shiraishi, *nee?"_

_..._

"...Neeeee?"  
"Oh... Ah, ah, ah yes. Of course you are."  
""Do you really mean that Shiraishi? REALLY?"  
"Ha. Of course I do, Akira."  
**"Bye-bee!"**

End desu~

* * *

This was fun guys~ See you again, and keep up the Shirakira/Shirogami/Minoru Shiraishi X Akira Kogami!


End file.
